12 Things About Cancerians

Crab

  1. Career career career. Enough said.
  1. Even though they’re career minded, they usually end up off the beaten track work wise. One that makes them money that is.
  1. And they do awesomely well at the aforementioned off beat- money making career path. Obviously. Duh.
  1. The need to be well-dressed at all times is going to end up killing them one day. I predict a pantyhose + doorbell + stabbed-in-the-eye-with-mascara situation.
  1. They have an awkward sense of humour that they feel is normal, which makes it highly endearing for the rest of us.
  1. Are even more uncomfortable with breakups than the average Joe, even the amicable ones! They rather slide along the traction than cause some friction. (Aren’t i clever?)
  1. Are humongously resentful of anyone spoiling the social roles in a clique. Newcomers are okay as long as they are exact carbons of whoever has left.
  1. Someone has to leave for the newcomer to even knock on the door.
  1. They like to party and get high. Whether its weed in a club or cakes in a leafy patio accompanied by gossip. Parties and sugar/caffeine/illegal substances/ alcohol are absolutely needed!
  2. They fool you into thinking “Aww.. what a quiet sensitive guy/girl, he/she never talks much.” And then NEVER SHUT UP. NEVEEEEERRRRR.
  3. What would they be saying you ask? Not saying, they’re complaining! About their boss, the rising alcohol prices, the dog on the street on the other end of the city, the man who looked at them funny or was wearing a funny shirt…
  4. But even though all this craziness, if a crab likes you, they’ll dig their claws in and hang in tight with you… no matter how much scream “AAAhhhhh!! Get this crab off my toe!!!”

 

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©Geetika Agarwal for PosterGully.com

hungry.garfield@gmail.com

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